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Brilliant Lit. by LeftUnfinished

Poetry Prose by Phantomtigers

Ecrits by Babou-Shka


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April 15, 2014
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The dusty air of the courtyard never seemed to settle,
invading the lungs of those passing by.
The hot afternoon sun bakes the stone roads black,
light tinged orange.

The man with the gaping eye,
his empty socket a crinkled web of scars.
A blank face looks upon me,
unseeing.

His once strong jaw,
now loose and misshapen from days he wishes he could forget.
He still knows their names,
they have long forgotten his.

His leathery fingers,
gnarled and twisted,
appear like the roots of an ancient oak tree.
Knuckles many times larger than they should be,
are cracked and worn,
weathered by both sun and time.

His calloused feet,
tucked and curled beneath him,
bear the scars and broken bones of times when he forgot,
crushed under foot and hoof.
He has long lost count,
it now hurts too much for him to walk.

His only eye,
it tells the story of his past,
whispering tales about the years of joy he used to have,
days so long gone they became legends to him,
legends he no longer believes in.
But legends cannot hide the deep sadness of his darker days,
the ones that followed when she left him to his madness.

His brilliant mind,
in those days,
was sharp enough to know what he had done,
yet too shattered to prevent it.
Today he still knows,
and it visits his dreams at night.

I hand the man an old chain,
his fingers collapsing around it,
feeling its surfaces,
holding it like the child he lost years ago.
He still has her picture in a rosewood box in his pocket,
wishing he could still see her smile.

Like a ray of sunlight,
the man with the gaping eye laughs,
face warped into a broad grin,
yellow and broken teeth bared.
A single tear running down his face,
his mouth moves wordlessly.

Thank you.
:squee: HOLY CRAP HOLY CRAP!!! A Daily Deviation :squee:

Thank you so much!!! :iconheavybreathingplz: I...I just....:la:


I don't know why this struck me today but it hit me like a ton of bricks. This story is loosely based off a beggar I saw many years ago in Italy outside The Duomo who was missing his right eye.

Not gonna lie, this is probably the saddest thing I have ever written but to be honest I'm also very proud of it. 

Anyway umm enjoy this...I'm going to go scour the internet for kittens now. 
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Daily Deviation

Given 2014-06-24
:iconcoffeegoeswild:
coffeegoeswild Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2014
Tells just enough to let the imagination fill in the details, and visual nature of the wording is impressive and elegant. The film maker in me was storyboarding throughout. I confess I usually can't stand the style, but this has a lovely none self conscious quality that really draws me in.  You've succeeded in creating free verse that sounds "right" to me, for lack of a better term. It rolls beautifully through the minds ear, and would be quite breathtaking if read by a competent actor. Very well done indeed, and crongrats on the DD. I'll have to give the rest of your work a look. Thanks for the lovely words, you made my day. 
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:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
:iconohstopityouplz: thank you for your kind comment. :heart: and while yes this is a free verse I did put a little bit of a pattern in there, it made it more of a challenge to write and forced me to put in some more precise words. "none self conscious"? im not sure i know what you mean but thank you. 

and i do hope you enjoy my other works, the first half of "Royal Offer" is pretty tame, and "Thief's Gambit" is relatively clean if my other work is not to your preference. I am trying to bring life and humanity to the world of erotica though :D
Reply
:iconzeromkx:
ZeroMKX Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
This is so sad in such a good way.

I'm glad that this isn't one of those poems that just say in general "IhatemylifeIhateeveryoneIthinkI'llkillmyselftomorrow" or something like that. I mean, it IS sad that they are in a miserable state, and I DO feel bad for them; but it does get a bit repetitive and seems a bit over dramatized.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
oh yeah back in high school im pretty sure i scared my teacher when we did poetry because my stuff was DARK. which was polar opposite of what i was, i think i just wrote it that way for satire. 
Reply
:iconoviedomedina:
oviedomedina Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014
This is amazing and sad!
Congratulations!
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
thank you. now go get your kitten therapy!
Reply
:iconthegalleryofeve:
TheGalleryOfEve Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Congratulations on your well-deserved DD!!! :iconflyingheartsplz::iconlainloveplz::iconflyingheartsplz: :clap::clap::clap:
I’m very happy for you!!! :iconloveloveplz: :tighthug:
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
awww thank you :hug:
Reply
:icontommyboywood:
tommyboywood Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Heck I would have given the poor schlep a monacle!
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
haha his "good" eye wasnt looking all that great either. i doubt it worked all that well 
Reply
:iconangelickittens:
angelickittens Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Absolutely beautiful.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you. The memory kinda hit me like a brick and i had to write about it
Reply
Flagged as Spam
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you :blush: 
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Flagged as Spam
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
i try
Reply
:iconlordsinrath:
LordSinrath Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014
Wasn't there a blind seer in ancient Greece?  Tiresias or something?  This poem reminds me of him.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
maybe you are thinking of the Oracle of Delphi. but no this guy was just a beggar
Reply
:iconthetaoofchaos:
thetaoofchaos Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014   Writer
Effective imagery. 
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
it was a powerful memory :D
Reply
:iconthenerdygirl-123:
TheNerdyGirl-123 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
This was beautiful it actually made me shed a few tears 
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
i cant read it without crying. writing this was really hard, i had to go into kitten therapy afterwards :D
Reply
:iconthenerdygirl-123:
TheNerdyGirl-123 Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Yeah i should prolly go do that
Reply
:iconphantomtigers:
Phantomtigers Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Wow... just wow... I think I've fainted. I remember that I used to draw a picture of every beggar I saw when I was a child, I don't really remember why, maybe it had to do with not wanting to forget all the people I couldn't help or something. It's still very sad to see, but you don't often see beggars where I live at least :\
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
yeah, where i am we dont have beggars either. we have homeless but i think most of them are too proud to beg. 
Reply
:iconwolfsoulphoenix:
WolfsoulPhoenix Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Absolutely beautiful, hon. You're right, I loved it lol. :)
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
hehe It took me a couple hours to perfect XD
Reply
:iconwolfsoulphoenix:
WolfsoulPhoenix Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Lol ahhh the glorious rewrite :). "No, wait, THAT sounds better...." :P
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
well i think it was worth it :D
Reply
:iconwolfsoulphoenix:
WolfsoulPhoenix Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Definitely lol
Reply
:icontacosavior:
TacoSavior Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2014  Student Writer
Holy shit. This is just deep.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
i still cant get through it without choking up a little. 
Reply
:icontacosavior:
TacoSavior Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student Writer
The plight of the poor is the pain to an individual with a caring bone in their body.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
though i will say the coolest homeless guy i ever saw was in San Francisco. he was missing both legs and in a wheel chair. but he had a cardboard sign that said "HEY!" on one side then he flipped it over and it said "Smile" and then he busted into a huge grin and so did everyone else around him.
Reply
:icontacosavior:
TacoSavior Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Student Writer
OMG IT WAS LT DAN!!!!
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
hahaha yeah but Lt. Dan was kinda a grumpy ass
Reply
:icontacosavior:
TacoSavior Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014  Student Writer
Jenny made me so angry.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
oh?
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconfruitncreme:
FruitnCreme Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Student Digital Artist
very nice,very nice the way you described :D
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
thank you. :hug: i was driving home and this hit me and i had to write it. there was no choice in the matter :D
Reply
:iconfruitncreme:
FruitnCreme Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2014  Student Digital Artist
alright,nice :b
Reply
:iconkate-colourtheory:
Kate-ColourTheory Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014   Writer
"Not gonna lie, this is probably the saddest thing I have ever written but to be honest I'm also very proud of it."

So you should be! This is an incredible piece. You've painted a sad, yet beautiful picture with your words. My thoughts when reading this, was that it had to be about an old homeless man [when I read your description, I saw that I wasn't far off.]

Well done! :D
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
thank you...i now prescribe you to go look at kittens so that you done suffer from acute depression   :D
Reply
:iconkate-colourtheory:
Kate-ColourTheory Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014   Writer
Hahahaha. :lol: I already suffer from depression. :P And I've got a gorgeous, fluffy ten-year-old cat who follows me around like a shadow. :) And you're most welcome. Keep writing. :D
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:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
nyaww makes me miss my kitty. long hair Russian Blue. about 14 years old. she is my second shadow.
Reply
:iconkate-colourtheory:
Kate-ColourTheory Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014   Writer
Awww. I just had a look at some pictures of Russian Blues. I bet she was adorable. :) I absolutely love cats, and kittens.
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
oh she still is. she is at my moms house. she even sleeps on top of me
Reply
:iconfruitncreme:
FruitnCreme Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Student Digital Artist
darn it, i want cats now! D:
Reply
:iconnightligt:
NightLigt Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
they are the best :D
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconkate-colourtheory:
Kate-ColourTheory Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014   Writer
Awww. :D The kitty I have sleeps next to me when I'm at the computer, and she'll curl up next to me, or sleep on my feet during the night.
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